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An important question for people to consider is “What really matters?” The answer could be the secret to unlocking your personal success and happiness. It could provide the momentum required to make changes for the better and these changes would carry a massive amount of motivation and energy behind them.

So what happens when you ask yourself the question “What really matters?” You might come up with various things. Maybe it is something about your family, career, house or even garden that really matters to you.

When you have thought of something, ask yourself ‘What is important about that?’ What is important to you about your family or your career? Maybe they give you joy and happiness, or a sense of achievement. Keep asking yourself what is important about that. In this way you will get to some higher purposes for yourself and what really matters to you.

For example, if money is important to you and you ask yourself what is important about that, you may say that it gives you and your family security. Again asking what is important about that may lead you to say security gives you a solid foundation to bring your children up in. And that may matter because you want your children to have the best possible life they can. This may be what you consider to be one of your highest purposes.

Clarifying what really matters to you in this way is a very valuable thing to do. Being aware of your higher purposes is very powerful. In the example above, knowing the higher purpose of wanting to provide the best possible life for your children might change how you do things on a day to day basis. If you had considered money to be important to you without considering why, you may have been working extremely long hours to make as much money as possible. However, this may mean much less time with your children and this could be in conflict with your higher purpose of wanting to provide the best possible life for your children.

Coming from the direction of knowing what is really really important to you may lead you to consider the different ways you can fulfill that purpose without conflicting with it. This will bring real motivation and energy to the things you do.

Try the following exercise for yourself:

1. Consider the following areas of your life - career, finances, relationships, fun/recreation and self development. Write down what matters to you in each of those areas.

2. Now look at your list of what matters to you and write down what is important to you about each of those things.

3. Continue doing this until you feel you have got to some higher purposes for yourself. You may find that the higher purposes from the different areas of life are the same or very similar.

4. Now look at these higher purposes and ask yourself if you feel that you are fulfilling these higher purposes. Also ask yourself if you are doing anything that may be conflicting with these higher purposes.

5. Then ask yourself how you could satisfy these higher purposes even more. Identify some changes that you can make to your life that will help you get more of what matters into your life.

6. See if you can commit to at least one of these changes and set yourself a target by when you will act on this.

This demonstrates a very powerful coaching method that can lead to some amazing changes. When done within a coaching session with a good coach it can lead to changes which can make a big difference to the clients life.

There is more for you to think about in the article Happiness, Beliefs and Thoughts where you can discover how your beliefs and thoughts affect your feelings.

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Having said this, even this sort of happiness is a product of positive thinking and positive action, with good fortune lending a helping hand. In short, it is a product of will in relatively favorable circumstances. But isn’t it peculiar to imply that happiness can be of one sort or another? Are there not simply happiness and unhappiness? I think not. The sort of happiness that the sage talks about is compatible with misfortune. It is preeminently a doing from within – while without, the only prerequisite for it is that the sage be alive and capable of thought. It is a feeling of serenity, of being at peace with his situation and his conscience, as a well-adjusted and fully committed servant of life, of humanity, of God as he sees them.

However conscious he is of the subjectiveness – i.e., the individual limitations and hence the imperfection – of his view, he does live by it with utmost faithfulness, if also with a willingness to reevaluate it critically when he catches himself out in a misstep. His wisdom is forever a work in progress; it is always laced with some form of foolishness, which leaves him open to ridicule. Humility and compassion, plus humor are therefore qualities that he cultivates. He mocks and forgives himself, and above all strives to improve. He shows no complacency, but an acceptance of his humanness that he is intent on bringing to the highest possible degree of truth and nobility. And this delicate blend of resignation and struggle alone – in any situation, favorable or not – is indeed the secret of his happiness, which admittedly is a dry manner of joy that fills the mind rather than the heart.

It follows that this happiness leaves something to be desired: happiness in the fullest sense of the word (a state of fulfillment, when everything is going our way, in terms of results as well as efforts), which is a joy, ever so sweet, that fills both the mind and the heart. When the sage experiences this supreme happiness, he rightly feels blessed, and knows how precarious it is. Furthermore, he accepts this precariousness, or the fact that suffering and ultimately death loom ahead. Only battles are won in the war of life that will inevitably – despite every valiant effort to prevail – end in defeat.

Some will say that happiness in its so-called fullest sense leaves something more to be desired: the power to make this happiness infinite: immeasurably great and unlimited in duration. Among them, some will choose the path of faith, which allegedly leads to a heavenly afterlife, whereas some will choose the path of reason, which admits of no rosy belief based on wishful thinking and unbridled trust. This path leads nowhere as far as the beyond is concerned, or rather somewhere that is unknown – presumably so different from what is known that it totally exceeds our ability to conceive of its nature.

I count among these proponents of reason, these infidels, to whom the only source of meaning is not a paradisiacal destination, whose existence is supported by no credible evidence, but the journey itself, a rugged and uphill journey to be sure, with an abundance of twists and turns, some of which are propitious, others not. This journey is well worth the trouble, in my opinion. It is so independently of the above-mentioned destination, which people are free to pursue blindly or regard with skepticism (and with detachment to boot, in the best case scenario). It is all about the dignity of living and loving and the pleasure of succeeding in these difficult assignments. From this perspective, the purpose of life is none other than life itself, in partnership with our fellow creatures; and happiness is made possible – within certain limits – by our striving to achieve this worthy, albeit humble purpose.

The limits imposed upon worldly happiness may initially stick in our craw, but after due consideration, as we realize that life without these limits would be death, we accept them, and better still we welcome them. Life is by definition a dynamic state that presupposes a perpetual tension between desires and their satisfaction. Render this satisfaction absolute, you resolve this tension and consequently reduce life to nothing; i.e., something as inert as a stone. And this nothing – this inert something – is death, as I just pointed out. Not a brilliant prospect in the eyes of a life lover! WomenMind.com

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Understanding The Subconscious Mind

Manifest Your Desire/Manifest Your Dreams

Your subconscious mind can be both your partner in success and in failure. Your subconscious mind is responsible for both your success and the lack of it.
Whatever is impressed in your subconscious mind is expressed as experiences and circumstances in your life. Your subconscious mind was shaped as you were growing up. Whatever you heard saw or felt through experiences became your beliefs. In turn those beliefs became part of your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind doesn’t make any difference between a lie and the truth. Every belief you may have are true for the subconscious mind.
Most of your experiences are produced by your subconscious mind and a reaction to those thoughts and beliefs of yours.
You are the seed planter and your subconscious mind is the garden. You are planting all day long with your thoughts into your subconscious mind. Depending on what you are planting you will reap in your life experiences.
If you don’t like much what you’ve seen so far, it is time to change your thought habits. It is time to plant better seeds in order to reap better results.
The first diagnosis you need to do about your thoughts is to become “aware” of them by taking a step back and just watch yourself thinking. Are your thoughts mostly positive? Are your thoughts mostly negative?
This is the main division of thoughts you need to do. What you find will give you an idea about who you are. Are you an UP personality or a DOWN personality? Lying to yourself will not help you any, so try to be honest and learn the truth in order to move forward.
Your subconscious mind is the source of your wealth
Many people get tied up in believing that fortune comes from an outside source when it really isn’t. Most rich people would tell you that their fortune was first in their mind before it materialized in money. Wealthy people are convinced that they are wealthy and even if they were to lose it all, they will end up getting rich again.
Poor people have convinced themselves that they are poor and even if they won a large amount of money tomorrow, they will lose it all over again if they had not changed their way of thinking. To keep money they would have to convince their subconscious mind. Have you ever heard of cases like these?
The only thing that needs to be done is to convince your subconscious mind that you already have wealth, regardless of the present situation. If you believe it strongly enough, your subconscious mind will do the rest.
Understanding what the subconscious mind is how it works will help you understand why you were getting the kind of results you are getting throughout your life experiences. It will help you understand your past and improve your future experiences.

The human aura is not always in a mention of relaxed phosphorescence, however. On the contrary, it sometimes manifests excellent flames, akin to people of a fiery furnace, which shoot forth in wonderful tongues, and dart forth immediately in selected directions toward the objects attracting them. Under distinguished emotional excitement the auric flames move around in swift circling whirlpools, or else swirl away from a centre. Again, it seems to throw forth small glistening sparks of astral vibrations, selected of which travel for wonderful distance.

The clairvoyant meditate vision is as well able to discern what is called the “prana aura” of a person. By this term is indicated that peculiar emanation of important force which surrounds the physical body of every and every part of person. In fact, many persons of nevertheless slight clairvoyant power, who cannot sense the auric colors, are capable to glimpse this prana-aura without trouble. It is sometimes called the “health aura,” or “physical aura.” It is colorless, or rather regarding the shade of clear glass, diamond, or water. It is streaked with very minute, bristle-like lines. In a state of excellent health, these good quality lines are stiff like toothbrush bristles; while, in cases of poor health, these lines droop, curl and present a furlike appearance. It is sometimes filled with minute sparkling particles, akin to little electric sparks in rapid vibratory motion.

To the meditation clairvoyant vision the prana-aura appears similar to the vibrating heated air arising from a fire, or stove, or from the heated earth in summer. If the student will close his eyes partially, and will peer via narrowed eyelids, he will in every probability be capable to perceive this prana-aura surrounding the body of a quantity of healthy, vigorous person—particularly if the person is sitting in a dim light. Looking closely, he will see the weird vibratory motion, similar to heated air, at a distance of on the subject of two inches from the body of the person. It requires a short practice in order to acquire the knack of perceiving these vibrations—a tiny experimenting in order to achieve presently the right light on the person—but prepare will hold success, and you will be repaid for your trouble.

In the same way, the student may by practice acquire the faculty to perceiving his own prana-aura. The simplest idea to obtain this last mentioned result is to position your fingers (spread out in fan-shape) against a black background, in a dim light. Then gaze at the fingers with narrowed eyelids, and half-closed eyes. After a tiny practice, you will see a first-rate thin line surrounding your fingers on every part of sides—a semi-luminous border of prana-aura. In generally case histories this border of aura is colorless, however sometimes a very pale yellowish hue is perceived. The stronger the principal force of the person, the stronger and brighter will this border of prana-aura appear. The aura surrounding the fingers will appear very much like the semi-luminous radiance surrounding a gas-flame, or the flame of a candle, which is familiar to approximately everyone.

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The aftermath of divorce is not good, and surviving it is even tougher. Getting on with oneís life after a divorce is difficult but not impossible. Resilience and a sincere approach is all thatís needed to stop wallowing in loneliness and get a life!

What Moving On Means

Although dating and finding someone new is part of the moving on process, it should not be the a guyís first priority. If the reason for the divorce is not third party on your side, then seeing someone new immediately right after the dissolution of your marriage not only reeks of desperation, but also creates another potentially problematic situation.

Moving on means being able to treat your ex in a civil manner, If she insists on being irrational and acting like a petty child then take the high road. Focus on the problem at hand like the kids. Avoid altercations about what could have been because thereís nothing you can do about it anymore. Make a clean break, start new with your ex try and be friend her.

Can You Become Friends With Your Ex?

Of course you can! Look at Demi Moore and Bruce Willis??? But Seriously Ö When the decision to separate is mutual or as long as thereís no cheating on either parties being friends with your ex wife again wonít be that hard. However if the reason for the break up was that you cheated on her, then sheíd probably slam the door on you, and you know you deserve it. If that is the case, give her time to heal. Be nice, show or tell her that you know what you did was wrong, but donít be too nice that sheíll think you want to get back together.

How To Show Her That You Want To Be Friends

People donít expect you to be chummy with your ex. being in a harmonious relationship with her is important when you have kids, because no matter what other people say divorced parents can still give their children a somewhat normal way of life.

The difficult part of trying to effect a reconciliation is that it can be misconstrued as wanting to be married again. The key to dispelling this misunderstanding is communication. Show your ex that you work better together as friends than as a couple. An acknowledgement of mistakes made on both your parts will definitely make things a whole lot easier. When presented with an obstacle particularly on the issue of finances and custody learn to compromise and take a deep breath when your tempers rise.

A Few More Reminders

As you try to establish a sense of normality in your life as a family but separate individuals, you just might be able to find happiness. Focus on your children. Ask them what and how they feel, do this together with your ex.

If you and your ex are doing one of ìyour talksî make sure that you two are not in an intimate situation, keep the kids within earshot. Avoid romantic situations because you both might reminisce and get carried away. This will harm your progress.

Try and take to heart the reminders above. Drama is not healthy for the soul and for the heart. Think about it, did you like those lonely holidays alone in a hotel, your kids at your old house having fun?

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Panic attacks are nothing but anxiety attacks. There are many different symptoms related to panic attacks. It can either be mental or physical but normally people having panic attacks show a combination of both the symptoms. It may be in varying degree with different people. However, there are now available, numerous methods that one can learn on how to cure panic attacks.

Most of us suffer from these panic attacks sometime or the other because it is body’s natural way to react to any real or perceived danger. It may get triggered off by various situations so to eliminate this ailment we must try to educate ourselves to be better equipped.

Before searching for cures to panic attacks, let us first understand the symptoms associated with panic attacks. A person having panic attack will feel lot of discomfort like rapid heartbeats, dizziness, chest pain etc. They may even feel sick and vomit.

The mental symptoms associated with panic attack are the feelings of intense fear or a sense of foreboding by the sufferer. They may feel as if this is end of the world for them.
The most effective cure for panic attacks is to try to learn techniques to remain cool and composed during an attack. This will have a soothing effect on your already strained nerves. Try to think of something pleasant and distract yourself when the attack is on you.

Anxiety attacks happen so unexpectedly and suddenly that you are caught unawares. And most of the symptoms resemble those of a heart attack. So don’t panic. If you are not sure of your ailment, it is better to consult a doctor to eliminate the possibilities of any grave medical problem.

After the check up, if you find out that you are suffering from anxiety attack and not a heart problem, then do not worry as there are number of easy ways to keep panic attacks in control.

It is important to have a healthy diet. Reduce or if possible do away with the stimulants in your diet chart. This includes caffeine which can be found in chocolates, colas, coffee. Your alcohol intake should also be in moderate quantity.

Since panic attacks are a series of negative thoughts compounded together, you can take help from some incident of your childhood which may have made you laugh uncontrollably. This therapy will instantly let you relate to a positive feeling when you need it most.

Slow down your breathing while you are having a panic attack. You have to make a conscious effort so as to eliminate the feeling of fear.

Panic attacks are very common to everyone. If you are looking for cures for panic attacks, you have come to the right place. Finding out the cures for panic attacks is not actually difficult. You just have to find ways to look for cures for panic attacks.

If you’re desperate to start enjoying life and stop avoiding situations that make you anxious, then learning how to cure panic attacks is imperative. You shouldn’t have to compromise with this disorder or let it take over your life completely. If you’re not sure how to get rid of panic attacks, then you might think that treating this disorder is difficult or even impossible. However, there are several things that you can do to prevent attacks and improve your methods of dealing with anxiety.

Panic attacks can interfere with your life in many different ways. You might find yourself avoiding situations that you fear could trigger an attack. You could even wind up being afraid to go out in public at all in order to keep away from stressful situations. If left untreated, panic attack disorder can lead to depression, problems at work or school, financial difficulties, alcohol and drug abuse, and suicidal thoughts. You could also be putting yourself at a greater risk of developing heart disease.

Even though panic attacks are not known to impose physical damage as they occur, the complications that can result from them should be enough to convince you to find out how to cure panic attacks. For professional help, psychotherapy and medications can help reduce the number and severity of attacks. For home remedies, there are several that are much less expensive than professional treatment and often more effective.

Stress management techniques can give you the tools and information you need to handle stress and anxiety. These methods provide you with the ability to calm yourself during times of stress or when you feel a panic attack is about to occur. You can use these techniques in any circumstances to help prevent panic attacks. Yoga, meditation, guided imagery, and deep breathing are all examples of stress management methods.

If you feel jittery, what you drink could be making your condition worse. Caffeine can increase your anxiety and make it more likely that you will suffer from a panic attack. Cutting out this substance from your diet can have a definite impact on your ability to handle stress. Other substances to avoid for the same reason include alcohol and illicit drugs. Eliminating these and reducing anxiety will make it easier for you to deal with how to cure panic attacks successfully.

These are just some of the ways that you can cope with anxiety and put an end to the panic attacks that are interfering with your life. Being able to deal with anxiety can go a long way toward reducing attacks, but an even better goal is to get rid of the anxiety that triggers these attacks in the first place. Knowing how to cure panic attacks involves learning how to free yourself from the fears and anxiety that are causing them.

Panic attacks are very common to everyone. If you are looking for cures for panic attacks, you have come to the right place. Finding out the cures for panic attacks is not actually difficult. You just have to find ways to look for cures for panic attacks.

Depression is the opposite of a state of thankfullness – it is a feeling of despondency that can be caused by inactivity, sickness (your own or that of a loved one), unemployment, any factor that sends the equilibrium of the mind into negative territory, a deteriorating economic state, a spouse or friend walking away from your life or even hormones. In other words, depression is what optomism is not.

Not what we say about our blessings, but how we use them, is the true measure of our thanksgiving. ~W.T. Purkiser

Depression first chokes and then, if not reversed, goes on to universally obliterate positive thought. It sends the positive thouts and attitude process on a downward spiral, and places the depressed person in a zombie-like stupor. A depressed person slows down at work, does not enjoy family life, ignores or avoids his friends and relations and remains in a condition of persistant dissatisfaction. That was the mental position – a depressed person is negatively affected on the physical front too because negative thinking releases harmful chemicals into the body. Additionally, a depressed person suffers from fatigue and keeps imagining that he is affected by medical conditions.

Depression has to be repelled as quickly as possible. The first thing that a depressed man may do is to reach out for anti-depressant pills, which give a temporary relief from depression. But, depression usually stems out of a negative thought process and the best way to fight it is positive thinking. Yes, a depressed person needs to start thinking positively to ward off depression, and one of the greatest factors that can usher in positive thought is the feeling of gratitude.

Gratitude, or thankfulness, is an appreciation of a benefit received. Expressing gratitude makes one feel good and also tanks him up with positive vibes, and he begins to feel upbeat and full of encouraging energy. The body will be energized and actually healthier. The big question, however, is what to be grateful for and to whom to express our thanks.

Well, the answer to that question lies inside each of us. If we take a look at our own lives, we will find innumerable instances that we can be grateful for. For instance:

We can thank the lord for giving us a good night’s rest, for a great sunny day and for the birds chirping in our backyard. If we have friends to fall back on, we must thank them for just being there for us. If we are healthy, we can thank nature for giving us a robust body constitution; if we are unwell, we can thank the doctors for bringing us out of our condition. Thank life for not leaving you alone, high and dry!

These were just a few examples – sure enough, you will find tens of reasons to feel thankful towards Nature and towards your family/friends once you start introspecting your life. So, go right ahead and do that, and when you discover the little things that add that sparkle to your existence, humbly express your gratitude to them.

The gratitude expressed will promote positive thinking, which in turn will drive away the darkness that depression has burrowed into mind. Gratitude will drive away the fears planted by depression and sprinkle your mind with good cheer, and once you are cheerful, the world will be wonderful. Forever.

To Do: 1) Make a list of 10 things that you are thankful for “right now”. 2) Put up a sign reminding you to make another list every day. 3) Add to your list during the day every time you start having any negative thought. 4) Save your lists in a scrapbook. 5) Read your scrapbook if you are having trouble remembering anything you are thankful for.

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